As is the case for any product sold by Amazon, customers leave reviews which rate the item and describe their experience. It makes sense to critique a book’s content, a music album’s sound or the features and functionality of new electronic gadgets. But would you say about something like a gallon of milk? The Tickle City Award Committee investigated and found the answer: hilarious stuff!
It appears that several years ago Amazon users decided to band together to craft incredibly silly reviews for certain food items. A gallon of Tuscan brand whole milk became the primary target, and the product has attracted over 1,200 of them. Here are a couple highlights:
I was in Tuscany recently, and despite my sincerest efforts was unable to sight any Tuscan Wholes. Given the rarity of this creature, I find it hard to believe that anyone one has managed to domesticate them, let alone convince them to give milk
Has anyone else tried pouring this stuff over dry cereal? A-W-E-S-O-M-E!
I thought I’d save a little money on this product so I clicked on the ‘Order it used’ button. Boy, was that a mistake! When new, this product is just fine. When used, it’s almost undrinkable. So, if you’re in the market for Whole Milk, heed my advice, buy new.
This phenomenon even made the NY Times, and the jokes then continued for several more years. Long after the initial push, some of the reviews added a literary angle. Consider this effort from “Edgar”:
Once upon a mid-day sunny, while I savored Nuts ‘N Honey,
With my Tuscan Whole Milk, 1 gal, 128 fl. oz., I swore
As I went on with my lapping, suddenly there came a tapping,
As of some one gently rapping, rapping at the icebox door.
‘Bad condensor, that,’ I muttered, ‘vibrating the icebox door –
Only this, and nothing more.’
The review continues and is actually a full length poem. There are also many more carefully crafted pieces of prose, which you can read by visiting the product reviews page.
Silly Amazon reviews, you are tickle city!
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on January 8th, 2011 at 3:10 pm
hahaha, I especially like the “buy it used” comment. that’s great.
on January 8th, 2011 at 3:32 pm
how have sales been effected by the hype?
Walsh Reply:
January 11th, 2011 at 9:34 pm
Great question. I’m not exactly sure about the sales numbers, but I’d have to think that the buzz created by a NY Times article and countless other blog posts would have had a really good effect.
That is, unless everyone was too busy crafting lengthy poems and essays about the milk and didn’t actually buy it!
young-eun Reply:
January 14th, 2011 at 10:18 am
I would never buy milk online. Especially used.
young-eun Reply:
January 14th, 2011 at 10:19 am
What is the purpose of buying food products online? Wouldn’t you have to wait several days, versus the half hour you would spend going to the store? Unless it was a specialty item, of course.
on January 14th, 2011 at 4:27 pm
Now I feel like a bacillus!This is indeed funny. I do read amazon review now and then because most of the buyers are so eloquent in expressing their reviews.
on January 21st, 2011 at 5:01 pm
God I love hilarious amazon reviews. There are just so many of them out there and they often have me laughing really hard. Good post!